So you will no doubt see plenty on this blog about my preparation for RideLondon (or RideLondon-Surrey 100 to give its full, rather catchy title).

After initially failing to secure a place in the ballot, I’ve been offered a place by Macmillan, the cancer support charity, to ride (and raise money) for them. I have a very strong personal reason for supporting this charity, which I’ll share in due course.

In the meantime, the purpose of this post was to ask a question (which may turn out to be rhetorical if no one responds). Please bear with me during the ‘set up’.

Here’s the background:

1. I know I should really get out on the bike, particularly in light of the need to ride 100 miles in 7hr 30m in August (that’s what I’ve said I can do…)
2. The riding conditions are ok: it’s above freezing and I don’t think there was a frost last night; it’s dry with perhaps the odd spit of rain
3. The biggie: I’m just not feeling it.  I’m a little tired; there’s a bit of a fug going on in my head

Here’s what I know:

1. I should put my kit on – this is easy to do and the feel of tight lycra on skin is not unpleasant (ahem)
2. I should tell myself that all I’m going to do is ride around the block
3. Once I’m out and riding, I’ll just keep going and I will enjoy it

And here’s the question (thank you for your patience):

Why don’t I just do that (put the kit on and ride down my street)?

More specifically, why am I still thinking about the longer ride (which I’m obviously procrastinating about) and not trusting the judgement of the future me (the one that will be sat on the bike, either enjoying it or not) to make the decision then?

Am I worried that the future me will decide to go for it?

If so, why does that bother the current me, who should arguably be pleased that he would become the sort of future me that elects to ‘just fugging do it’?

What do you think? Am I just going mad (in a slightly philosophical way)?